I am not tellin!

Discussion in 'Ride Reports' started by Tom the Bomb, Mar 17, 2015.



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  1. Tom the Bomb

    Tom the Bomb Well-Known Member

    Location:
    Alta Loma, Ca.
    Name:
    Thomas Cosgrove
    Current Bike:
    Niner rip 9
    The worst ride review ever!

    I am not going to tell you Dangerous Dirty D picked us up at Howies and shuttled us up to South fork for the start of the ride. Or how he showed up on crutches just a few weeks after ACL replacement surgery.
    I won’t tell you that Ross, Tom (t-2), Lenny, Burt, Pat, Mike and I were the Bomb Squad crew for today. It’s also not a good idea to let you know that Mike from the O.C. showed up in his cool 4 wheel drive monster travel van with everything in it for the ride except his camelback, water and food. Also how there was no way we were sending him home with his tail between his legs without a Bomb squad epic to brag about. Then how we sent him into Walgreens to find food, water, a pack and how he emerged with a backpack to make us all jealous, filled with all the picnic essentials.
    I probably should not explain how we whooped and hollered from south fork to Uncle Howie’s, bobbing, swooping and railing the ever endless pristine single track of the Santa Ana River Trail, and at the end having to slap our faces to release the muscles so that we could assume a normal look after smiling for the last 5 1/2hours and 39 miles.
    I should keep a secret how we stopped at the country store to top of water and food supplies or that I bought some coconut water with Lenny’s money, added it to my water bladder and how refreshing it tasted every time I took a sip. (What a great idea that was). I also should not let out how I was the only one to clean the log bridge crossing the river before glass road. (Man was I stoked). Rossage and Mike missed it by a hair. Do not remember how the others did.
    I should leave out how once we got to the top of Morton Peak how relaxing it was and how bummed Mike was knowing the end was approaching. Little did he know we still had 5 miles of red ribbon single track left to descend. Or how once we hit the road that Energizer Bunny Ross decided to drop the hammer for the next 3 miles and that Lenny lit out after him first and the rest of us put the power to the pedal. They just made the the yellow light and we had to stop on the red so the rest of us had our own race to blitz with Pat pulling us in.
    Oh ya I should not tell you that when we got to the Bomb Squad Mobile how much everyone loved the ride and wished it would never end.
    Also I should not let the cat out of the bag that while standing in line at Uncle Howies Pat was so bummed the ride was over his face went pale and almost fainted. (With an ice cold coke and some food chased by an ice cold brew he pulled through. Had us spooked there for a minute, we love ya man!)
    We probably should not mention that Burt had a 30 M.P.H slide out on a high speed sweeper headed over to Morton’s or that Rossage just had to sampled the forest dirt. T-2 Also tried to imitate my nasty handle bar hooking face plant (2 years ago) into the rocky hillside ass over elbows finishing the backside of the Postoffice single track. Also how I continue to donate forearm blood to the trail gods. No broken bones or bikes just bruised egos!
    Almost last but not least you should not know that we had no mechanicals, no flats, and no reason not to do this again.
    And in retrospect I regret to tell you that this ride with it’s awesome riders and Haul the Mail personality was indeed EEEEEEEEEPIC baaaaaaby!
    Until the next lousy ride report,
    TTB

    Yes we liked it..jpg

    Plump, hydrated,dehydrated and satisfied..jpg

    Tom digs it.jpg

    Mike.jpg

    Burt.jpg

    bar shot of the sweetness.jpg

    We like fast single track!.jpg

    gettting ready to descend the back side of Morton Pk.jpg

    The perfect rest stop.jpg

    Well deserved break at Mortons.jpg

    12mile stop making sure we have it all for the next 27 miles.jpg

    xc single track killer.jpg

    Getting ready to climb to the postoffice.jpg

    T-2.jpg

    piss just missed it.jpg

    Good stuff Lenny and Mike.jpg

    Glass rd.jpg

    This is the Chit baby!.jpg

    Are we having fun yet.jpg

    Ready to rip from South Fork. TTB,Burt,Ross,Tom,Mike,Lennyand Pat.png

    custom picnic pack gettem while they last at walgreens,fully stocked.jpg

    The meet at Howie's.png

    walgreens special save Mikes ride!.jpg
     
  2. hill^billy

    hill^billy Well-Known Member

    Location:
    Prescott
    Name:
    hill^billy
    Nice report and I'm jealous of course! Wish I lived closer sometimes!
     
  3. rossage

    rossage iMTB Hooligan

    Location:
    East Sacramento
    Name:
    Ross Lawson
    Current Bike:
    Highball
    I will not mention that was a great ride report. I also will not thank TTB and the boys for an amazing day on SART. No one will mention the personal sacrifice of our DirtyD driver-we know it hurt buddy!!!

    PS-just because your smiling doesn't mean you don't have to drink water-right Pat? Our SART ghost had us scared at the end, but all is good now. :D
     
    Mikie, DangerDirtyD and mtnbikej like this.
  4. mike

    mike iMTB Hooligan

    Location:
    Western US
    Name:
    Mike O
    Current Bike:
    GG Smash
    It goes without saying...solid crew, solid route, solid ride. One solid day of MTB fun, you could say. If you were going to say it.

    :cool:

    Nice confidentiality, guys!
     
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  5. redwoods

    redwoods Member

    Location:
    Rialto Heights, CA
    Name:
    Pat
    Current Bike:
    Kona Process 153 G2
    Awesome ride report Tom!

    Dangerous Dirty D - You're the man! Thanks for driving us! Get back to riding health soon bro!

    So, the ride...
    So, I guess I shouldn't ( ;) ) repeat what I told Tom afterward - that it was probably one of the all-time best rides I've ever been on. Period. It was one of those magical, everything-comes-together times. You know what I'm talking about...when it all "clicks", and the sum of the good things is way beyond what any of them would have contributed singly. This is a level of stoke only rarely achieved. I'm truly fortunate to have been part of it!

    The weather was really good...PLUS the trail was in phenomenal shape...PLUS our group was amazing (strong, skilled, stoked!)...PLUS the bike was working flawlessly...PLUS energy levels were high...When so much works in your favor it's easy to get into a deep flow state, where your adrenaline is up, but not spiking and crashing; you stay energized, but not too sketchy. It's like nothing can stop you! Awesomeness! I'm still buzzing from the ride 2 days later! (And no, it's not from any cloud that may or may not have been in the vicinity. :lol: I don't judge, but I don't partake. :cool: )

    I had been having some doubts about the 1x cranks I just installed, and whether I'd like not having a granny gear. Well, it worked out just fine. Climbing was harder, but it was over sooner - had no choice but to go faster than before, or just stop (not an option!) Also, I had some misgivings about my fitness, as I hadn't done anything longer than about 20 miles in quite some time. I actually think this is what led to my decline after the ride, more so than a lack of water intake. Turns out I had consumed about 70 oz from my 100 oz bladder, plus a 12 oz Gatorade at the store, plus a pint of water in the car on the way up. I think I had simply reached and maybe pushed just past my limit for the day. Turned out alright after some food and drink.

    Thanks to the crew on this ride - 8 dudes who know how to get it done the right way! (Dennis, you too!) It was the very definition of an epic ride, in all aspects!

    IMG_4354.JPG

    IMG_4355.JPG
     
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  6. Mikie

    Mikie Admin/iMTB Hooligan

    Location:
    Lebec, California
    Name:
    Mikie Watson
    Current Bike:
    Santa Cruz Hightower/Yeti 5C
    It goes without saying there is no way I'm going to share that this was an Epic ride report, the pictures sucked, and obviously you did NOT write this report! Who did you get to write this TOM! The energy ripping off my iPad as I read the stoke of every well written paragraph did not get me anywhere jealous. It's a good thing I didn't go as I would have hated every minute of it.....
    Good Job Bud!
    That was a great read . . . as was Pat's addition...

    It must have been pretty bad . . . there is a pic in there with T2 actually smiling!!! :eek: THat's terrible!
    :clap:
     
  7. burt

    burt Member

    Name:
    burt
    Proper 5 star adventure, this one. Couldn't ask for better conditions. Good ride all.

    Thanks for the sacrifice DirtyD, that's a tough trailhead to leave by car.
    Thanks for the trailer Tom, and T-Bomb for the land yacht cruise.

    Pfff, 'was totally a controlled drift from at at least 30 to 7 mph.

    IMG_20150315_125456.jpg
     
    DangerDirtyD likes this.
  8. herzalot

    herzalot iMTB Hooligan

    Location:
    Laguna Beach
    Name:
    Chris
    Current Bike:
    '20 Pivot Firebird 29
    Thank god you did not report that non ride otherwise I would not be not jealous. :mrgreen:


    I am so glad that Pat - tall guy who wears a flowing draped bandana under his helmet - finally rode with TTB - tall guy who wears a flowing draped bandana under his helmet. I am not sure who was the OG of that look, but I am soooooooooooo happy it's catching on. :wave:
     
  9. DangerDirtyD

    DangerDirtyD iMTB Addict

    Location:
    CA
    Name:
    Chicken Nugget
    Current Bike:
    2018 Guerrilla Gravity SMASH
    Shuttling the BombSquad was fun; I still get to lust over bikes and feel like part of the gang. I'd be happy to do it again. Great RR, Bomb!
     
  10. redwoods

    redwoods Member

    Location:
    Rialto Heights, CA
    Name:
    Pat
    Current Bike:
    Kona Process 153 G2
    This is some funny Sh!t right here!
     
  11. redwoods

    redwoods Member

    Location:
    Rialto Heights, CA
    Name:
    Pat
    Current Bike:
    Kona Process 153 G2
    I gotta say that my hero on this ride was Burt. Dude's like 6-foot-40, absolutely killing it on the 26" hardtail with a 3" coil fork! I was trying to keep up with him most of this ride (had moderate success at this when going downhill, then I wondered where he hid his motor when climbing Morton Peak), and got to watch him whip that thing around like he was born on it!

    But it has to be said...if you want to be a better rider, rider with better riders. This entire crew is continuously pulling each other to new levels of awesome. They're the real reason this ride was so epic.
     
    DangerDirtyD likes this.
  12. mike

    mike iMTB Hooligan

    Location:
    Western US
    Name:
    Mike O
    Current Bike:
    GG Smash
    No Sh!t, Pat, Burt pulled everybody along. My tongue was hanging out up the hill and here comes Bart back down, because, once was not enough. Then I'm thinking it's the rider not the bike, then I think of his bike, and I realize how truly freaking weak I am. It was g-dam awesome.
     
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  13. burt

    burt Member

    Name:
    burt
    Hah thanks, that was pretty good day for me: I usually get a lot more OTB reps in on DH-centric trails like that. Must of been the good vibes from the group, a little goes a long way.

    Props again to Mikes picnic pack and lunch meat power slices. I'll have to remember that trick.
     
    rossage likes this.
  14. Tom the Bomb

    Tom the Bomb Well-Known Member

    Location:
    Alta Loma, Ca.
    Name:
    Thomas Cosgrove
    Current Bike:
    Niner rip 9
    Hmmmmm they are correct on my screen.

    Mikey check out Hillbilly's post.
     
  15. Tom the Bomb

    Tom the Bomb Well-Known Member

    Location:
    Alta Loma, Ca.
    Name:
    Thomas Cosgrove
    Current Bike:
    Niner rip 9
    Pat I drank 116 oz on the ride. Had nothing left at the end.
     
  16. Tom the Bomb

    Tom the Bomb Well-Known Member

    Location:
    Alta Loma, Ca.
    Name:
    Thomas Cosgrove
    Current Bike:
    Niner rip 9
    Burt you are one badass rider! Hard tail 18 in. seatpost no dropper, 6 in. stem, simply amaizing. I am not going to let you keep trying out my bikes! You get one and you will smoke all of us! :D
     
  17. scan

    scan Well-Known Member

    Name:
    fran allas
    Current Bike:
    Scott Spark
    Wow!! One of these days Tom!
     
  18. DangerDirtyD

    DangerDirtyD iMTB Addict

    Location:
    CA
    Name:
    Chicken Nugget
    Current Bike:
    2018 Guerrilla Gravity SMASH
    Thanks to the geologist for the safety gear! Dayamn! :D
     
  19. Grego

    Grego iMTB Rockstah

    Location:
    Fullerton
    Name:
    joe
    Current Bike:
    WFO9
    Everyone on a bomb squad ride should wear the bandana.
     
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  20. herzalot

    herzalot iMTB Hooligan

    Location:
    Laguna Beach
    Name:
    Chris
    Current Bike:
    '20 Pivot Firebird 29
    ...and a mustache
     
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  21. DangerDirtyD

    DangerDirtyD iMTB Addict

    Location:
    CA
    Name:
    Chicken Nugget
    Current Bike:
    2018 Guerrilla Gravity SMASH
    Haha! That would be awesome! Calendar photo shoot for sure!
     
  22. Mikie

    Mikie Admin/iMTB Hooligan

    Location:
    Lebec, California
    Name:
    Mikie Watson
    Current Bike:
    Santa Cruz Hightower/Yeti 5C
    Hey what a cool idea... an imtbtrails calendar with the last years awesome pic for each month...
     
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  23. DangerDirtyD

    DangerDirtyD iMTB Addict

    Location:
    CA
    Name:
    Chicken Nugget
    Current Bike:
    2018 Guerrilla Gravity SMASH
    Great! I have just the outfit for the warm summer months! ;)
     
    Mikie likes this.
  24. DangerDirtyD

    DangerDirtyD iMTB Addict

    Location:
    CA
    Name:
    Chicken Nugget
    Current Bike:
    2018 Guerrilla Gravity SMASH
    Paging @buggravy ...This is what you get to look forward to for the next several months...if you dare!
     
    Mikie, mike and mtnbikej like this.
  25. buggravy

    buggravy Well-Known Member

    Location:
    Calabasas
    Name:
    Matt
    Current Bike:
    Guerrilla Gravity The Smash
    Haha, certainly not out of the realm of possibility. Not to sound all woo woo Dudley Doright, but in (over)thinking about what I can do to productively occupy my time in the coming months, the revelation came to me that the answer is probably not a new project, activity, etc., but instead to simply not focus on myself much at all (save for taking care for recovery purposes), and instead focus on being of service in whatever capacity I can. Ultimately that will probably be the best form of self care anyway. We'll see how that lofty goal plays out, but I suppose shuttling you fine folks around could fall into the category of service. It wouldn't suck to hang with y'all anyway.
     
    Mikie, Walleye, mike and 4 others like this.
  26. mike

    mike iMTB Hooligan

    Location:
    Western US
    Name:
    Mike O
    Current Bike:
    GG Smash
    Hah, this was a classic outing!

    I forgot my pack and instead bought that ice chest/backpack at Walgreens and tossed in some groceries. Yay, Walgreens!

    27.5" bike...yep, that was awhile ago.

    Nice bump, D. :thumbsup:

    Mattgravy, no guitar strumming while at home? No stress, just a healthy pastime assuming no finger injuries. :)
     
    Mikie, rossage and DangerDirtyD like this.



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