Defending Oneself With a Bicycle

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by BigTex, Jun 14, 2018.

  1. BigTex

    BigTex Member

    Ladera Ranch
    Current Bike:
    Pivot Les
    herzalot, Danmtchl, Mikie and 2 others like this.
  2. Runs with Scissors

    Runs with Scissors iMTB Hooligan

    West Anaheim
    Mark Whitaker
    Current Bike:
    2015 Giant XTC Advanced 1 29er
    Fun read. :thumbsup:
    Danmtchl and Mikie like this.
  3. Mikie

    Mikie Admin/iMTB Hooligan

    Lebec, California
    Mikie Watson
    Current Bike:
    Yeti ASR5c, SC Hightower
    Hah! That was good stuff! :sneaky:
    Danmtchl likes this.
  4. herzalot

    herzalot iMTB Hooligan

    Laguna Beach
    Current Bike:
    '15 Intense Tracer 275c DVOish
    Here's another tactic to employ when confronted by a foot-pad with ill intent...

    Push your saddle all the way down as you approach the would-be assailant. Employ the approach and swerve technique, if that fails, dismount and use the "bike as a shield" positioning. Lean your steed towards the assailant, and when he (or she for modern times) is close enough, push your dropper post lever, catapulting your saddle straight into your assailant's nose, causing immense pain and recoil from the mighty blow. Then ride away in triumph!

    If that doesn't work, reach for your energy bar that you have stowed in the rear pocket of your jersey, but instead pull out your Glock and shoot him. Won't he be surprised?
  5. SnakeCharmer

    SnakeCharmer iMTB Addict

    Crescenta Valley
    Mike, aka "Snake"
    Current Bike:
    I used a similar technique to this a year or two ago against an angry Pitbull that wanted very much wanted to gnaw on me.

    herzalot likes this.